Tips and advice for men and women who have recently split up from a spouse and are now getting divorced.
I remember hearing awhile back that alcohol addiction was the number one cause of divorce. I don’t know if that’s true, but if it is, I wouldn’t be surprised. Divorcing an alcoholic (or deciding to stay) is not an easy choice. There can be guilt involved, along with fear, frustration, anger, resentment, compassion, and a … Read more
I’m a dog lover. I have two dogs named Simba and Sierra. They are very special to me, and I can’t imagine my life without them. That’s why it’s heartbreaking to me when divorcing clients ask me this question: Who gets the dog in a divorce? The answer to the question is complicated because … Read more
Are you looking for peace after divorce? Of course you are! Who wouldn’t be? So why do some people achieve peace after divorce and some people stay stuck in a place of frustration, anger, bitterness; in a state of war, with others and with themselves? In my opinion, the different lies in one word: Self-awareness. … Read more
Holidays are supposed to be fun and action-packed, but they can feel challenging and overwhelming, especially for divorced parents. Nearly 88 percent of Americans find the holidays stressful—now add in co-parenting on top of all the hustle and bustle! But co-parenting during the holidays doesn’t have to be stressful. In fact, co-parenting the right way … Read more
In many states, including Illinois, divorcing couples with children are required by law to attend divorce mediation in an attempt to come to custody, financial and other child-related agreements. Some couples are able to find success by mediating, and all that’s left to do is for their attorneys to draw up an official agreement and … Read more
For the past 15 years of being a divorce mediator, I’ve seen countless scenarios of divorce. Every single case is unique. That said, there is one thing I find almost always in couples: sadness. Whether you were totally blindsided by your spouse’s decision, or getting divorced was your decision after years of trying to make … Read more
Loneliness might be the most painful emotion a person can have. It can feel empty and scary and sad and unfair. Being lonely can make a person feel sorry for him or herself. It can make a person feel angry, like “Why me?” It can make someone feel unworthy of love, or like maybe they … Read more
Getting through a divorce is a stressful and painful period in life. Even when we know it’s for the best and the future will be happier and brighter, it’s hard not to feel anxious and overwhelmed at the time. And, although it’s worth it, reinventing yourself after the divorce isn’t easy. This is especially true … Read more
You know the divorce makes sense. Things haven’t been right for a long time. Maybe he hurt you. Maybe he’s not a good person. Everything in your core is telling you being apart is the best thing. Yet, still, there’s a little part of you from time to time who thinks, ‘I miss my ex … Read more
Co-parenting with a narcissist seems like an impossibility. But, truthfully you’re not really going to be parenting with them, it’s more like you’re going to be parenting around them. There’s a difference between co-parenting, and parallel parenting. With someone who has strong narcissistic tendencies, it’s almost impossible to co-parent. Why Is It So Hard Parenting … Read more
Divorce is one of the most devastating things you can go through, not just emotionally but financially, as well. Many women come out of the process with a financial situation that seems disastrous. Part of the reason is because the divorce process is so expensive, but part of it is because they are often left … Read more
Here are excerpts from an email I received from a single mom who writes, “I was cheated on.” The woman dated this guy for 8 years. Seven months ago, she found out he cheated on her for the last year of their relationship, basically living two lives. He ended up choosing to be with the … Read more
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