Child Support Statistics That Might Surprise

In a perfect world, child support is calculated and implemented based on a formula. Number of overnights per year, who pays for health insurance to cover the children and salaries of both parents are entered into a software program, called Family Law Software, which determines the amount of child support a parent pays the other. The person pays that amount on a monthly basis and the couple continue to parent their children as they have agreed or been ordered to do. Sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Unfortunately, people don’t always follow the law. Child support statistics of non-compliance are staggering.

Fiscal 2023 Preliminary Data Report and Tables from the Office of Child Support Services report upsetting trends.

The median amount that custodial parents were supposed to receive was $4,356 per year but the median received was $1,800. That means less than half was received.

65% of child support was actually collected.

Reasons these child support statistics are so high and that people do not comply with child support obligations include:

1. They are angry because they did not want to get divorced in the first place.
2. The parent ordered to pay child support is bitter because judge ordered them to pay and, in their mind, it’s unfair.
3. They are having a difficult time meeting financial obligations now that they are in two homes after their divorce.
4. Spousal support and child support payments do not leave them with as much money as they anticipated to meet other expenses.
5. They do not believe their spouse will take action to recover the money.
6. They want to irritate and infuriate their spouse.

What is child support used for?

Child support legally belongs to the children and is to be used for food, shelter, and clothing. Medical expenses are shared proportionate to income of each parent. Child support is also to be used for other expenses for the children which can include school supplies, after-health insurance co-pays, extra-curricular activities and religious training.

Bridging the Gap Between Conflict and Resolution

In a court of law, child support may not be waived since it belongs to the children. It is the one thing in a divorce decree that is required by statute, though it may be reserved, meaning not enforced.

Child support can be reserved if any of the following factors are true:

1. the parties earn about the same income.
2. they each earn enough to take care of the children without
3. the parent who would be receiving it is adamant that they don’t want money from the other; or
4. they are sharing overnights 50/50 so the incremental amount of child support would not make a significant difference.

Child support is always modifiable, meaning either party can go back to court at any time to have it changed. Instances where this may occur: one parent losing a job, one parent getting a higher or lower salary or income, or change in the number of overnights.

The person required to pay child support often wants an itemization of what the other person is using child support to cover. By law, they are not entitled to that information. They make accusations in mediation like the other person is using it for expensive clothes for themselves, vacations with or without the children, or perhaps a new significant other.

So, how do we solve this problem? First, try the app OurFamilyWizard, which allows parents to share expenses so that each can see exactly (with receipts) where the money is going. This app can reduce resentment, anger and can improve the co-parenting relationship, which is better for everyone, including the kids.

Another way to solve this issue is mediation.

Anything you can agree to do in mediation is better than having a judge order you to do something. Both parties will feel better about it because you and your spouse came to the decision together. You negotiated a plan that works for the two of you rather than having a judge impose his or her ideas on your family.

As earlier stated, child support is dictated by a software program where you input information about salaries, health insurance coverage for the children and amounts and number of overnights you each have with the children. To the extent you can mediate your divorce, the other issues that really matter, having the mediator provide the dollar amount for child support is a small issue in the scheme of important decisions the two of you will have made for yourselves and your children.

Not only does mediation work for couples getting divorced, it is a process designed to work for years and years AFTER a divorce, to help teach parents the basics of communication for the benefit of the kids.

Ellen Feldman has been working as a mediator since 2007. A graduate of Smith College and Indiana University School of Law, Feldman previously worked as an attorney for 15 years practicing commercial litigation. Since 2006, Ellen has been a volunteer for The Lilac Tree, an Evanston based nonprofit organization assisting women through the process of divorce. Additionally, Feldman completed Family and Divorce Mediation Training through DePaul University Center for Conflict Resolution and Advanced Family Mediation. She is a court-approved mediator for the 19th Judicial Circuit Family Court of Lake County. Learn more by visiting the C.E.L. & Associates website.