Difficult, Disrespectful and Toxic: How To Coparent With This Person

how to coparent

By Cherie Morris, J.D., Divorce Coach, Parenting Coordinator, Divorced Girl Smiling Trusted Professional

Divorce is never easy, and when children are involved, the complexities multiply. At DearDivorceCoach.com, we understand the myriad of challenges parents face when navigating co-parenting, and we focus how to coparent. We are also very aware of those situations in which coparenting can get extremely difficult when an ex spouse is disrespectful and toxic.

That’s why we’ve developed the Co-parenting Compass Course—to provide you with the guidance and tools necessary to create a healthy, balanced co-parenting relationship–even in situations where the ex is disrespectful and toxic. This course covers everything from understanding co-parenting fundamentals to creating a custody schedule, communicating effectively with your former partner, and supporting your children through the transition.

Understanding Co-Parenting

Co-parenting is more than just splitting time with your children; it’s about creating a cooperative environment where both parents work together for the best interests of their kids. Our course begins by defining what successful co-parenting looks like. You’ll learn the importance of consistency, stability, and a united front in raising your children, even from separate households.

 

Redefine What Family Means Post- Divorce

 

Deciding a Custody Schedule

One of the most critical aspects of co-parenting is establishing a custody schedule that works for everyone involved. The Co-Parenting Compass Course provides step-by-step guidance on how to create a balanced and flexible custody arrangement. We help you consider factors such as your children’s ages, school schedules, extracurricular activities, and the logistics of transportation. The goal is to develop a schedule that minimizes disruption and allows your children to maintain strong, loving relationships with both parents.

Communicating with Your Children

Talking to your children about divorce and the changes it brings can be daunting. Our course offers strategies for having these difficult conversations in a way that is age-appropriate and reassuring. We emphasize the importance of honesty and emotional support, helping your children understand that both parents love them and are committed to their well-being. You’ll learn how to answer their questions without disparaging your co-parent, maintaining a positive and respectful tone that fosters a sense of security.

Best Practices for Communication with Your Former Partner

Effective communication with your co-parent is essential to successful co-parenting. The Co-Parenting Compass Course teaches you best practices for maintaining clear, respectful, and productive communication. You’ll learn how to de-escalate conflicts, set healthy boundaries, and collaborate on decisions regarding your children’s upbringing. By mastering these skills, you can reduce stress and create a more harmonious co-parenting relationship.

Taking Care of Yourself

In the midst of co-parenting challenges, it’s easy to forget to take care of yourself. Our course emphasizes the importance of self-care and emotional well-being. We provide strategies for managing stress, seeking support, and maintaining a healthy balance in your life. Remember, taking care of yourself is not just beneficial for you but also for your children. When you’re in a good place emotionally, you’re better equipped to handle co-parenting challenges and provide the stability your children need.

Creating Appropriate Boundaries 

Boundaries are crucial in any co-parenting relationship. The Co-parenting Compass Course helps you establish and maintain appropriate boundaries with your co-parent. Whether it’s about communication, visitation schedules, or decision-making processes, setting clear boundaries ensures that both parents respect each other’s roles and responsibilities. This clarity helps in reducing misunderstandings and conflicts, leading to a more peaceful co-parenting dynamic.

Responding Thoughtfully 

When emotions run high, it’s vital to de-escalate before responding to your co-parent. Our course teaches techniques for managing emotional reactions and responding thoughtfully rather than impulsively. By taking a step back, calming yourself, and then addressing the issue, you can avoid unnecessary conflicts and foster a more cooperative relationship.

Supporting Your Children 

Your children need to feel loved and supported throughout the co-parenting journey. The Co-Parenting Compass Course provides you with tools to ensure your children feel secure and understood. We emphasize positive reinforcement, emotional availability, and maintaining open lines of communication with your kids.

In conclusion, the Co-Parenting Compass Course at DearDivorceCoach.com is designed to guide you through every step of the co-parenting process. By focusing on effective communication, self-care, and establishing healthy boundaries, you can create a supportive and nurturing environment for your children. Remember, successful co-parenting is about working together for the well-being of your kids and taking care of yourself in the process.

Cherie Morris
Cherie Morris, J.D., Certified Divorce Coach, Founder, Dear Divorce Coach

 

Cherie Morris practices as a Divorce Coach and Parent Coordinator. She is trained as a lawyer, yoga teacher and is also an author and mother.

​Cherie’s legal training makes her approach to issues logical and reasoned. She began exploring alternate dispute resolution and mediation in order to understand how to change the nature of conflict and improve dynamics when conflict occurs, in litigation and otherwise, when a solely rational approach may not succeed. Her approach to conflict now is that rational thinking must be accompanied by the ability to empathize and compromise in order to achieve successful results.

A divorce agreement is a very important contract that requires each party to recognize, and think about, the long-term consequences of taking specific action now. She believes it is very important to understand and analyze each decision in divorce carefully, and rationally, but with a strong consideration for your best self and a relationship that may continue with a former spouse well into the future, especially when there are children involved.

There are many professionals who may serve an individual in divorce, but a divorce coach may be the only one acting as an objective thinking partner who will help you decide how to frame important decisions that will serve you and your children now and well into the future.

Cherie is convinced that the best interests of children are served in divorce when the adults act as their best selves, inspiring their children to see that flexibility and resilience are important life-long qualities for all of us. This applies whether you are contemplating, in the midst of, or have post-divorce complications.

Cherie has four children of her own and is part of a blended family. She is delighted to include her partner’s daughter and say they have a combined five. Life is always interesting and challenging.

In addition to her work with Dear Divorce Coach, Cherie is available for parent coordination sessions and coaching sessions regarding divorce and other life transitions for individuals and couples too. Learn more or schedule a free consultation.

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