The Anthony Rizzo speech is one that no one will soon forget. “He’s taught me how to be a better person,” said Rizzo of his teammate and friend, David Ross. So, does your spouse make you a better person? That’s the topic of this week’s Love Essentially.
8 Ways To Apply Anthony Rizzo Sentiments To Relationships
by Jackie Pilossoph for Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press
Standing on stage in front of more than 5 million Cubs fans, first baseman, power hitter and perhaps the most lovable Cub (he’s definitely mine), Anthony Rizzo gave a speech that didn’t leave a dry eye in the massive crowd at the team’s World Series celebration last Friday.
With tears brimming in his own eyes, 27-year-old Rizzo, who hit 35 home runs this season (including three in the playoffs), paid tribute to his teammate, mentor and good friend, David Ross, aka Grandpa Rossy.
“He taught me how to become a real winner,” said Rizzo, who has been with the Cubs since 2012. “He’s like a brother to me. He’s taught me a lot in life, on the field and off, how to be a better person. I’m forever grateful to him.”
Rizzo’s endearing words got me thinking. Isn’t what he said about his friend applicable to romantic relationships? I believe that if you can say your spouse makes you a better person, then you have a key ingredient to relationship happiness. So, ask yourself, “Does my spouse bring out the best in me?”
In the past, I have been in relationships that didn’t work because looking back, I answered no to that question. Why? Maybe it was bad timing. Maybe he wasn’t a good match for me. Maybe I was trying to be someone I wasn’t because I thought I wanted the relationship to work out. The bottom line is, when you look in the mirror, the person you’re with, like a flattering garment, should look good on you.
What I have learned – both in divorce and beyond – is the best, most fulfilling romantic relationships are the ones where you can say most or all of these eight things, all which foster the desire to be a better person.
1. He or she is interesting
Do you realize how much you can learn from another person? Whether it’s a museum he takes you to, a book she recommends, a trip the two of you take, experiencing new things with your partner can only enrich your life and make you more interesting, experienced and wise.
2. I respect him or her
If you have respect for your spouse, you will want that person to respect you, as well, which could make a difference in the way you live your life.
3. I like him or her
When it comes to relationships, it is almost more important to like your spouse than it is to love him or her. Liking someone means you enjoy doing things together, talking to each other and spending large amounts of time alone with that person. With like comes the desire to make the other person happy, and to be the best person you can be.
4. I adore him or her
It is easy to be madly in love with your spouse at the beginning of the relationship, but as years go by, those feelings of intense love could fade if the two of you let it happen. The key to keeping the sparks lit is to treat each other the same way you did when you were first falling in love. Don’t stop holding hands, kissing in public and saying and doing things that make your spouse feel cherished, important and appreciated.
5. I trust him or her
Having trust in someone feels really, really good, doesn’t it? Trust renews faith and nurtures self-confidence.
6. My arms are wide open
Fulfilling relationships are the ones that bring out the giver in us. Offering unlimited support, listening to his or her needs and doing what you can fosters not only a powerful connection, but self-love, knowing you are making a difference.
7. I am unafraid of vulnerability with him or her
Being vulnerable is perhaps the scariest part of being in a romantic relationship for some people. But if you have the courage to show your authenticity, you will be greatly rewarded. Showing vulnerability and then feeling accepted for exactly who you are makes you feel like you can fly.
8. He or she motivates and inspires me
There is nothing like support and encouragement from the person you love most to keep you hard working, driven and determined to fulfill any goals and dreams you might have.
Rizzo isn’t alone. The entire team brought out the best in each other this season, and that is probably the reason history’s lovable losers ended up as the 2016 World Series champions. Romantic relationships are no different. Why?…(Click here to read the rest of the article, published in the Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press)
Like this article? Check out my article,
“Vulnerability: Don’t Settle For A Knockoff When You Can Have A Real Prada Bag.”
I’m not a huge sports fan, but I love this analogy. I agree that good friendship and romantic partners have the same qualities to make a solid relationship. Great comparison, Jackie. The eight qualities are all so accurate. 🙂 I was missing a few of these in my previous marriage.
As an attorney of nearly 10 years, I have represented more than 500 clients in family law. Based on my experiences with my clients, the Rizzo Speech can easily be applied to marriages and other relationships. Based on my experiences, ‘trust’ is paramount, along with ‘making each other better people’, and genuinely ‘liking each other’, but again ‘trust’ is paramount.