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does couples counseling work

Does Couples Counseling Work? Sometimes.

Does couples counseling work? Consider a common scenario: Jack is convinced that his marriage with Diane is over. After years of struggle, arguments and distance, he announces his already-formulated plan to end the marriage. Diane is shocked. She knew they had problems but didn’t think he would actually “pull the plug” on their marriage. In … Read more

Growth and Transformation: A Retreat I Attended in Samos, Greece

My company, Divorced Girl Smiling, is designed to help people getting divorced find good professional resources, and that includes divorce coaches. So, almost on a daily basis, I am referring people to coaches I think can help them in growth and transformation. But what’s ironic is, I myself have never participated in a coaching program. … Read more

divorcing a narcissist

5 Tips to Keeping Your Sanity When Divorcing a Narcissist

Divorce is hard no matter the situation. It’s huge life change. Long held beliefs and expectations are shattered, and everything moving forward is going to be different from the life you know. If you have children, there is an additional level of angst, as you are still tied together and must learn to co-parent. These challenges … Read more

having difficult conversations

4 Tips to Having Difficult Conversations With Your Ex

Having difficult conversations with your ex before, during, and even after a divorce can feel overwhelming, especially if problems communicating were a part of your life together. While it may seem like conflict is inevitable, using a few practical communication techniques can help create opportunities for collaboration, even when emotions like anger, hurt, or frustration … Read more

bringing up the past

Why Bringing Up the Past in Relationships is Unhealthy

I hear so often from men and women having marital issues, as well as couples going through a divorce, that one or both partners keeps bringing up the past. What does bringing up the past mean? It can mean a few different things:   1. What each person did when they were single (before they … Read more

budeting and investing

Budgeting and Investing for Divorced Women

As a private money manager and advisor, I have worked with many divorced women in budgeting and investing as they embrace their new lives. Whether they are still working or are coming away from the divorce with a lump sum of money or both, I find that the task of knowing what you can spend … Read more

divorce guilt

Do You Have Divorce Guilt? Stop This Right Now!

From a DGS reader: Feel ALL the guilt today. My body physically hurts. My temples feel bruised from tension. We made the divorce official and told friends and family. We’re still living together until the end of the school year. This divorce guilt is killing me. He’s broken to pieces about our split. I hate … Read more

divorce loneliness

Divorce Loneliness: Reasons and Remedies

Statements I hear from those with divorce loneliness: I feel so alone. Nobody understands what I’m going through. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this. I’m terrified of being by myself. It’s so quiet in this house. What if I’m alone forever?  Issues pertaining to isolation and divorce loneliness are among the … Read more

lies in a relationship

Lies in a Relationship: 25 You Might Have Heard or Told

Everyone lies. Let’s face it. Little white lies are told to avoid hurting someone’s feelings, lies are told to make things easier, and sometimes people lie and they don’t even know why they lied. The other day, I was having lunch with a girlfriend who was complaining that she hadn’t heard from a guy she … Read more

Here’s an Idea: Heal After Divorce in the Kitchen

How do you heal after divorce? There are so many ways. Therapy, meditation, time, and more. But I want to share an unconventional tool to help you not only heal after divorce, but to rebuild your confidence and joy, and to regain your sense of self. During divorce, finding grounding activities is essential, and that … Read more

hating your spouse

Keep Hating Your Spouse. It’s Really Good For You

Are you one of those divorced people who is really hating your spouse? I mean deep hatred? If so, my advice is: keep hating your spouse. It’s good for you. Wait, what?! I mean that in a very very sarcastic way. Let me explain! One night, I was very upset with the way my ex … Read more

child support statistics

Child Support Statistics That Might Surprise You

In a perfect world, child support is calculated and implemented based on a formula. Number of overnights per year, who pays for health insurance to cover the children and salaries of both parents are entered into a software program, called Family Law Software, which determines the amount of child support a parent pays the other. … Read more