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Ugly Divorce? Feeling Pretty Is Important

  I’m not sure I’ve ever met a person going through a divorce who didn’t describe it as “ugly.” Isn’t an ugly divorce sort of expected? I mean, we can all say we know this one couple getting divorced who are really amicable, who are still “best friends” and who have made the transition easy … Read more

Your Ex-Husband’s New Girlfriend: Love Her, Hate Her or Indifferent?

I’ll never forget the first time I ever met my ex-husband’s new girlfriend. She was beautiful, blonde, much younger than me, and the worst one: NICE! I felt sick. I felt old. I felt ugly. I felt depressed. I really wanted to hate her guts. The problem was, I just couldn’t. She was (is) so … Read more

everything my partner does irritates me

Everything My Partner Does Irritates Me. Of Course it Does!

From a reader who says, “Everything my partner does irritates me:” Jackie, Why, when people are in a serious relationship, do they sometimes irritate one another to the point where they don’t even want to talk? Is getting annoyed with your significant other common? Is it normal? I really love him, but everything my partner … Read more

Why Rushing Into Relationships Might be a Bad Idea

In my Love Essentially column that came out today in Sun-Times Media Local, I talk about reasons why men and women rush into relationships, and why rushing into relationships isn’t always wise. What baffles my mind, even more than single people rushing into a relationship is when divorced people do it. I really just don’t … Read more

Divorce and Binge Eating: I Get It

Divorce and binge eating is something I am personally familiar with. Years ago, when I was getting divorced, I can remember being so stressed (a combination of anxiety, anger, fear, sadness, hopelessness) that at times I used food to cope. More than just a few times I would stand in front of my freezer shoveling … Read more

thinking about separation

Man Thinking About Separation: Should I Stay or Should I Go?

Here is an email from a man thinking about separation from his wife. I truly feel for him because it really is a tormenting decision to have to make. Jackie,  I’m thinking about separation. A few months ago I found out my wife was cheating on me and now I’ve been left with the decision … Read more

We’re Into Each Other! So Why is His Profile Still on Dating Websites?

In my “Love Essentially” column published today in the Sun-Times Media local publications, I respond to a reader’s e-mail regarding a guy she met on one of the dating websites, who she really likes. There’s one red flag: his profile is still active on the site! Here’s my advice to her.   Jackie, “I dated … Read more

Dealing With the Pain of Divorce: Sometimes You Just Need to be Crazy

A reader sent me the following e-mail that I can’t resist sharing because it sparks a discussion about dealing with the pain of divorce, and how that pain, which can be gut-wrenching at times, can cause us to act crazy. The reader refers to the Miranda Lambert Song, “Mama’s Broken Heart,” where Lambert is going … Read more

how to end a relationship on good terms

How to End a Relationship on Good Terms with the Prince Turned Frog

When I got an email from a reader asking how to end a relationship on good terms, I immediately thought of the famous post it note that Berger gave Carrie on Sex and The City. that read “I’m sorry, I cant. Don’t hate me.”     Here is the email I received: I recently met … Read more

Let’s Talk About Sex After Divorce–Safe Sex, That Is

Divorced Girl Smiling received this e-mail from a reader seeking advice about sex after divorce and how to be safe. I went out with a guy a couple of times and we really hit it off. Our relationship quickly became physical and in the heat of the moment, I did not address the issue of … Read more

dating a coworker

Dating a Coworker is Sexy but Not Always Wise

There’s nothing more romantic than sneaking into a supply closet at work with your new boyfriend or girlfriend — who is also your coworker — to start kissing. Your secret relationship from the rest of the office is sexy, exciting and fun. But, dating a coworker has its challenges, including the risk of damaging your … Read more

divorce movie

Divorce Movie Sends Powerful Message

 I finally had a chance to see the divorce movie, Enough Said, a romantic comedy about dating after divorce with James Gandolfini (the last movie he made before he died) and Julia Louis-Dreyfus.  Aside from the fact that it was a delightful, entertaining story, done with great taste, amazing writing and two top-notch actors, there was … Read more